👂 Voices From the Gut-trix 👂
You’d think by Day Three I’d have found peace. Clarity. Maybe a watermelon-shaped halo.
Instead, I found myself cross-legged on the floor, incense burning, trying to center my spirit… while my stomach began a full-blown roast session.
I wanted stillness.
I got sass.
🎙️ “You think enlightenment can save you from hanger?”
That’s what my stomach said.
Out loud.
Like it had been waiting for this moment to clap back.
I tried to focus on my breath. My mantras.
But the internal monologue turned into a comedy roast + intervention.
“You meditated yesterday. Didn’t stop you from dreaming about funnel cake.”
“You’re not a monk. You’re a snackless gremlin in a hoodie.”
“Feed me. Or I’ll make you remember the drive-thru.”
At one point, I swear I heard it say,
“This is why kale left you.”
🧘♂️ But I didn’t give in.
I didn’t order food.
I didn’t scroll for comfort.
I didn’t fall for the lie.
Instead… I laughed.
Not just at the voices, but at how insanely hard it is to reprogram the brain after decades of food-as-escape habits.
And in that laugh—I found a sliver of truth.
This wasn’t hunger. This was resistance.
The Matrix was fighting back.
🧃 The Clarity Creeps In…
Later that night, I sat quietly. No incense. No guided audio. Just me, upright, not running.
And something shifted:
- I didn’t feel ashamed.
- I didn’t feel fluffy.
- I didn’t feel controlled.
For the first time… I felt present.
Like I was driving my body—not riding in the trunk while sugar, shame, and sodium took the wheel.
🍉 A Note to You (and Me)
You’re going to hear voices—literal or not.
Cravings. Excuses. Commercial jingles from 2007.
They’re all just noise from the Gut-trix trying to keep you programmed.
But now you know.
You are not a code. You are the one who decodes.
You are not your cravings. You are the witness. The rebel. The glitch.
And most importantly… you are the captain now.